H is a sensitive kid. Sometimes I think of it as just being tenderhearted, but every now and then he goes in waves where he seems overly so—crying about not being able to play with toys because it's bedtime, sobbing if a small toy dog comes near him, and crying if we suggest the kids race to see who gets their pjs on first. It appears we're in the midst of a wave.Last Friday, about two minutes after H and S took off for school on their bikes, I happened to look on the kitchen counter and realized that H had forgotten his lunch. I ran to see if I could catch them, but they were already past the playground. "Well, he can get school lunch today. No biggie." The kids have money in an account at school so they can get school lunch twice a week, so I figured H would just do that. Then I remembered which kid I was dealing with. I knew he would not realize that he could just do school lunch, and most likely would get very upset. So, I planned to take his lunch to school right after I dropped T off at preschool in 30 minutes.
Fifteen minutes later, I got a call on my cell phone. Whoever it was didn't say anything, but I could tell they were trying to. I was about to hang up when I realized it was my son, probably crying so much that he couldn't speak. I said his name over and over but he still wouldn't/couldn't talk. His teacher came on the phone and said he was very concerned about not having a lunch and I assured her I was bringing it over soon.
When H got home from school, we talked it over and I told him if that were to ever happen again, he should just get school lunch. My mom suggested we talk as a family about different potentially troubling situations that could come up to try and head off H's emotional meltdowns. I think it's a good idea, but honestly, so many different things seem to be setting him off these days, that I'm not sure my husband and I can think of all the potential scenarios. I'd also like to help him "toughen up" for all the years of sports, possible bullies, and just life stuff that is sure to come his way.
*Sigh.*
Anyone have any advice?
5 comments:
No advice, but I could use some. I guess you heard the story about B, same story basically. He is also so sensitive. If things go differently than he expects them to he has a complete meltdown. The big one lately is him wanting to run down to the car and be buckled before anyone else gets to the car. If you happen to get there before he's ready, complete melting down occurs. It's lovely.
Anytime I read blogs of people with older children it makes me realize how I have no idea about anyone over the age of three. There are so many different things to worry about when they're older! Like I was just reading about a friend talking to her 6 year-old about not watching YouTube at friend's houses, and then yours - how am I ever supposed to think of all this stuff?! And I have a sensitive child like yours. I thought life was hard enough now!
Yea my H is the same way too. I haven't figured it all out. I have trouble too guessing what situation will make him melt today. I think this is where a lot of prayer and one on one with him will help. We are trying to teach our H to say a quick prayer if he gets scared or worries about something cause Heavenly Father cares about him and his worries. It seems to help some.
We have one of those. I focus a lot on helping him to have the words to use to tell why he is upset, sad, angry. I find it enormously helpful to really reach back into my limited memory and remember how monumental these things are to a kid even though they seem so trivial to us now. That way I approach it from an empathic way instead of an angry way. But teaching the words to use has been really helpful...like giving various pharases i.e. it makes me frustrated, upset, afraid when...or this has been great, Mom, I need help saying what I feel..
anyway those are my ideas--oh and age. Sometimes its just a matter of growing up. But I am a strong believer in whatever was their weakest point as a kid usually becomes their strength as an adult.
That makes me laugh because that is totally what Tyler is like!!! He cries if we forget to give him a hug as we leave or wants to play a little longer or if he accidently hurts his brother... he just breaks down. :D
He will be like that in school one day too. Thanks for the heads up to not let him forget his lunch.
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